Posted in Blog/Vlog Announcements

The Japan Poetry Series

I’ve been itching to get a bit creative for quite a while. Specifically, I’ve wanted to craft poetry about Japan, but kept talking myself out of it. Poetry and I work well together in private, in scribbles on notebooks on the way to work, with a few selective moments here and there to share with friends. Putting poetry out there for the world to see scares me more than a little bit.

But I want to attempt something small to work my way up to something big. See, I have wanted to be a novelist since I was eleven years old. Hell, I even wrote a massively terrible romance novella when I was in seventh grade. After all these years, it’s finally time to get the finished things published and out there.

Still, I keep getting these haunting voices from past English teachers that I need “more” all the time. More editing, better vocabulary, more humor! In middle school and high school, I never really felt supported by my teachers with my creative endeavors. I was actually accused of not taking my work seriously, which hurt and once again made me really not want to show my work. I was never an English class darling, even though I adored all my English classes.

Funny thing is, I can’t NOT write. I just keep doing it anyway, all the time. I have hundreds of notebooks just sitting around with half-formed ideas and plot lines. In university, I met a lot of like minded people, other English majors who were similar in their drive for writing. I managed to publish some poetry and get my work recognized, but then I moved to Japan.

Even here, I still write all the time! I just get so nervous about sharing it. I’m a terrible critic of my own works. However, I know if I want to achieve my goal I can’t just keep waffling. This series is basically a compromise on my nerves and on trying to achieve my long term goals.

For now, I’m limiting myself to a poem a day for only seven days. I might make poetry a regular occurrence maybe on a specific day if I find I enjoy it, but if not then I’ll just have this one series. Also, if you all enjoy it then I might be more inclined to keep going. If it’s not well received, then I suppose lesson learned.

The first work will follow shortly after this post. I hope you enjoy it and my work!

 

Posted in Blog/Vlog Announcements, Uncategorized

Changing Things

I’m getting into the rhythm of this new stage in my life.

Well, I’ve got a job and a new apartment, so it’s all slowly coming together anyways. Unlike when I worked at my previous job as a high school teacher, the odds of overtime for this eikaiwa job will be few and far between. In other words, I have no excuses to not devote the time I need to my goals.

The high school job allowed me to make great friends with great co-workers, but it didn’t allow for much time for myself. Looking back, I let myself get really sucked into the Japanese way of working. I went to work on Saturdays when requested, I worked during holiday times when requested, I stayed after school late often for English Club, all because I enjoyed what I was doing. I felt really connected with the teachers and the students, and was fulfilled in many job satisfaction aspects.

But at the same time, I realized that in the three years I worked there, I didn’t publish nearly enough stuff. I actually started several new hobbies. Comedy shows, YouTube, performance shows, volunteering with Stonewall Japan, it all added up. At the same time, those hobbies weren’t my passion. I kept crunching time to do this activity and this other activity, but I didn’t make enough time for writing.

I was also Stonewall Japan’s Vice President for a year, which was a wonderful if challenging experience. I learned a lot, gained much needed experience in team building and project management, but it was essentially a volunteer part time job. So many aspects of the national leadership role demanded time and attention, which in turn meant devoting less attention to what I wanted to do.

I decided for myself the best thing to do would be to step down from such a major role. Instead, I will be Kanto East Block Leader for the next year, which will be a significantly less responsibility than Vice President. I will still be a part of Stonewall’s plans for pride events and such, but I won’t be planning meetings, attending leadership meetings, vetting out new people, checking in on National Newsletters, etc.

What am I gonna do with all this free(er) time? I’m going to write more.

I want to make more content for this site and other sites I have. I want to write more freelance articles and get my name out there. I want to start self-publishing these novels just sitting in my hard drive and waiting to be pushed into the world. I want to really focus in on the love I always had for writing, but never devoted enough time to it to make it the thing I do for a living.

It will be a process, it will take effort, but I want to make it happen.

I’m the kind of person who always has pens, notebooks, or other stationary items on hand just in case an idea pops into my head. I will write scribbles of novel ideas into agendas, tell myself “one day,” but then the one day never comes. I’m tired of always dreaming about it or talking about it but never getting it done.

It’s time to change that, it’s time to just quit kidding myself. I’m not superwoman, and I can’t do every single thing I enjoy as well as give myself time to write. I have to straighten out my priorities into the way that’ll get me to where I want to go. To be sure, I’ll continue to do my hobbies. Specifically, the comedy shows and YouTube will keep being regular occurrences, but I won’t be running off to this event or that one all the time anymore.

One of the goals I have will be doing daily posts. They might be short or long, but they will be up here. I hope that the daily posts won’t be too annoying for people following me, but I need this exercise to keep me actively writing.

Change can be daunting, but the one is for the best.